Digging Deeper

Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.  1 John 3:18-20

“Talk is cheap.” We’ve all heard or used this phrase, and most of us have probably been on the receiving end of empty promises and idle vows.

I am reminded of the song “Mercy in Me” by Todd Agnew.  In it, the narrator encounters a homeless man.  He acknowledges that he could buy the man lunch, but doesn’t because he hasn’t got enough to buy lunch for them both.  So instead, he prays for more for himself.  He comes upon a young mother who needs clothes.  He keeps his old clothes and tells her he’ll pray for her.

While prayers are crucial, we are also directed to take action as much as we’re able.  This action typically involves sacrifice of some sort.  In the case of the song, it’s a missed lunch so someone else may eat, or a few less choices in the closet so someone else may be warm.

In our daily lives, the sacrifices we’re able to make are small when compared to the impact they can have on the lives of others and for the kingdom of God.

A great example of love in action is coming this weekend.  We have over 80 families that will be coming to the Ridge for the Car Winterization.  Each of us has some part to play, and when all of our small sacrifices of time, talent, and food come together, it results in a massive outpouring of love for our brothers and sisters.

Here is a link to the Todd Agnew song I mentioned, Mercy in Me.

Lord, thank you for the riches you have poured on me so that I may share with those in need.  Help me to remember to put the needs of others in front of my own as my actions speak louder than my words.

Read: Matthew 5:1-16

Jeanne Roberts

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers 1 John 3:16

I think it’s fairly easy to say that we would die for someone.  First of all, if we say it, it’s generally about someone we love: our spouse, our child, our parents.  I’m positive we really believe it too.  Secondly, the odds that we will ever actually be faced with the choice to die in order to save another are pretty slim indeed.

What’s really difficult is to say that we would live for someone.  Even to say it about the same people we’d “take a bullet for” it pretty tough.  To live for others is a choice that’s made every single day.  Usually, it’s nothing quite as heroic as jumping in front of a bullet, nothing that will make the 11:00 news.  Living for others means continually and mindfully  putting their needs, their comfort ahead of our own, with no thought of receiving something in return.  That’s what it means to “lay down our lives for our brothers”.

It’s taking out the trash on a cold morning.

It’s going outside at 2 a.m. to check out a noise.

It’s preparing someone’s favorite dinner that you might not like.

It’s letting someone go ahead of you in line at the grocery store.

Lord, thank you for the perfect example of brotherly love through your son Jesus Christ.  Help me remember it’s the seemingly small things that speak the loudest.

Read: John 15:12-19

Jeanne Roberts

No one who is born of God will continue to sin, because God’s seed remains in him; he cannot go on sinning, because he has been born of God. 1 John 3:9

Seems like a pretty tall order, doesn’t it?  In the beginning of my walk with Christ, every time I’d stumble, I’d fall into a pit of despair because I’d sinned yet again.   I felt like such a failure.

I spent time in the Word, and I spent time with people who were mature in their faith.  I was reminded that though God hates sin, and cannot look upon it, that’s not the end of it.  I was reminded that Jesus was and is the bridge that covers the chasm between us and God.

That knowledge, that reminder changes everything.  I’m not sinless, and I never will be as long as I draw breath.  However, because I’ve been born of God, I recognize my sins, and I strive to sin less.

In my old life, I didn’t recognize my sins.  The word wasn’t even in my vocabulary.  In thought, in deed, in word, I behaved as I wished.  Sometimes I was “good”, sometimes I was not.  Either way, it didn’t matter much to me.

“He cannot go on sinning” does not mean that when we accept Christ we become perfect.  It doesn’t mean that if we screw up, we’ve lost our salvation.  What it means is we cannot go on as we did before we knew God.  We don’t want to.

I know personally, I can feel defeated in the face of my sin.  Keeping in fellowship with other believers and regular time spent in the Word helps to keep me from ‘beating myself up’.

Lord, thank You for the gift of salvation, for the gift of Your Son. Help me to remember to look to the Word for strength in the presence of sin.

Read: Psalm 51:7-17

Jeanne Roberts

This is how we know who the children of God are and who the children of the devil are: Anyone who does not do what is right is not a child of God; nor is anyone who does not love his brother. 1 John 3:10

One morning in February 2006, something changed.

I came to church on Sunday, like I’d been doing every Sunday for the past six-ish months.  I’d been feeling something tugging on my heart for a year before that, but I wouldn’t acknowledge it.  I was sure that I was mistaken.  I was sure that the people around me had a relationship with God, but I really wasn’t good enough to ever have something like that.

God made it clear to me, on that cold morning that He wanted to call me His child.

Finally, I stopped ignoring Him.  Finally, I trusted that I wasn’t being tricked.  Finally, I opened my heart and let Him in.

“How precious did that grace appear the hour I first believed.”

I was a different person.  I felt like Dorothy when she went from black-and-white Kansas to the colorful world of Oz!

Since then, I’ve often wondered if the changes are as apparent to others as they are to me.

Remember those spot-the-difference puzzles from kids’ magazines?  There are two images, side by side, and you have to… um, spot the difference.

If I could take a picture of me before I knew Christ, and a picture of me since, and I laid them side by side, could anyone spot the difference?

I wonder if at first glance, people could say, “Well, here’s the difference, she’s alone in this picture, in the other one, she has Jesus with her.”

Or are the changes less visible?  Would someone say, “Well, it looks like she doesn’t curse in this picture… give me a minute, I’ll find something else… there isn’t a time limit on this, is there?”

Thinking of all the ways my life has changed, I want this for everyone.  I want every person I see to have this grace, this salvation, this love.  My part in that is to make sure that even those who don’t know God can see Him in the picture of me.

Lord, I can never give enough thanks for the love You have given me.  Help me to make the changes in me as visible as clothing.

Read: Isaiah 61:10

Jeanne Roberts

“No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful.  Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”  Hebrews 12:11

My etymology (origin of words/phrases) dictionary lists the following under the heading “discipline”:

- instruction given to a disciple

- order necessary for instruction

- orderly conduct as a result of training

I think it’s important to mark the difference – especially to our kids – between discipline and punishment.  Proper and consistent discipline can keep us from punishment later.

When I think of discipline, here’s some of what comes to mind:

Pick up after yourself.

Be respectful.

Work before play.

These are things we teach our children so that they can become properly functioning adults.  Likewise, we are also required to be disciplined.  For example, if the list above is some of what’s required of our kids, we have to resist the urge to pick up after them, tolerate disrespect, or let them shirk their responsibilities.

It’s easy to make excuses for them, “She’s had a tough day, I’m sure she didn’t mean to talk to me like that.” ; “He worked after school, I’ll just put his laundry away for him” ; “They’re always hitting the books, it’s okay for them to goof off now and then.”   When we do this, we think we’re helping them, but we’re not.

Just as we’re training them for this life, we’re also responsible for training them for the next.  We lead by example, whether we like it or not.  Are we training them to pray, to tithe, to submit to the Father, to help the helpless, to love those unable to love back?  We are equipping them to be future Titans of Industry, are we training them to be the future Nation of God?

Lord, thank You for your instruction and discipline.  Help me relay this knowledge to my children so that they may be trained according to Your Word.

Read: Deuteronomy 11:18-20

Jeanne Roberts

“Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes’ and your ‘No’, ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.”  Matthew 5:37

So, the kids will never admit it, and in fact, they probably aren’t even aware of it, but they need boundaries to feel secure.

One way we as parents can provide that security is to be consistent.  Think of our rules as a fence.

When the fence is clear and strong, our kids know they are safe within its perimeter.  They can lean on it, push it, but it won’t budge.

When our resolve is weak, our fence topples over at the onset of pressure.

While they may act like their job is to weaken the structure, that’s when we have to show them it is secure.

When my girls were little, they got the ridiculous idea that if they said “please” enough times, a “no” could turn into a “yes”.  Ugh!   I started asking “Has this ever worked for you? Ever?”  Eventually, they saw that it didn’t work, and instead made Mommy pretty darn grumpy!  They only stopped though, when they really learned that “no” is really “no”.

Likewise, it’s just as important to our ‘fence’ that our “yes” remain a “yes”.  This is where I often fail.  I may agree to something on Tuesday, but by Friday I may have completely forgotten or just don’t feel like doing whatever it is.  When my “yes” becomes a “no”, they are usually very gracious and they tell me they understand, but I know I’m weakening our fence little by little.

Which is harder for you?  Keeping the “yes” a “yes” or the “no” a “no”?  Got any tips for those of us who struggle with one or both?

Lord, thank You for this lifelong adventure of parenting.  Please help me be consistent in my words and deeds.

Read: Ephesians 6:1-4

Jeanne Roberts

When you walk, they will guide you; when you sleep, they will watch over you; when you awake, they will speak to you.  Proverbs 6:22

“But all my friends are allowed to <insert activity here>!”

I wish I had a dime for every time I’ve heard that.

My kids have cell phones, but no texting.

They’re not allowed to go to parties with no adults present.  (That seemed like a no-brainer, but I was really thrown by how many non-supervised parties happen in this little town!)

They’re not allowed to “hang out” downtown.

They’re not allowed to dress in a provocative manner.

All of these things used to be a source of discord in our house.  As time has gone on, they’ve accepted that some things will not be tolerated, no matter how many other kids are doing it.  In fact, they’ve not only accepted these things, but they are seeing the merit in them.

Since becoming a Christ follower, I have tried to put Biblical principles into our day to day lives.  I’m not only teaching them the Biblical way to live, I’m learning as well.  Making the right choices together helps the lesson stick.

They know that I was not exactly a “good kid” when I was their age.  They know that as I grew up, I continued to make bad decisions.  I used to worry about my credibility.  How can I tell them not to do something when I’ve done it myself?  I’ve found though, that the past holds a wealth of lessons, and my credibility is based on the decisions I make now.

Lord, thank You for equipping me with Your Word to teach my children.  Please be with them as they are faced with the challenges of popular culture.

Read: Deuteronomy 6:6-9

Jeanne Roberts

“God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” James 4:6

Okay, be honest – who has bumper stickers, t-shirts, and window stickers about their kids?

I have to admit it, I’m rockin’ a few stickers on the back of my car.  I have one letting everyone know that Faith is the Drum Major for the marching band.  I have another one in the opposite corner of the window (nicely balanced) informing all who pass by that Megan is in Color Guard.  And, since I’m being honest, I have to say I will probably replace those stickers with new ones announcing to everyone that they’re both in Winterguard when that season starts.

I don’t think that there’s anything wrong with stickers or t-shirts, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with thinking that our kids are pretty neat.  It’s so easy though, to let them become the center of everything we do, say, and think.

A child-run home is out of balance.  The kids have no boundaries, the parents have no control.

Instead of the children looking to their parents for guidance, and the family looking to God, the parents are looking to their children for validation.   “If my child is happy, then I must be a good Mom.”

Of all the parents all over the world, in all of history, only one family had a child who was and is the center of the universe. Even then, Mary did not fly a banner over her house, she didn’t paint sayings on the livestock.  Although, thinking about it, Mary could have had some pretty cool bumper stickers, couldn’t she?

Picture it:  ”My Son Came to Save Your Honor Student”

or “Your Kid is Okay, but Mine is Perfect”

how about “Proud Parent of The Savior”

We all want our kids to know we love them. The best way to show that is not by giving them center stage in our lives, but by giving center stage to God.

Read: Proverbs 16:1-7

Heavenly Father, thank You for the blessing of my children.  Help us to remember to put our boast in You instead of ourselves.

Jeanne Roberts

“But they, our forefathers, became arrogant and stiff-necked, and did not obey your commands.” Nehemiah 9:16

The verse above is part of the praise that the Levites gave to God regarding His refusal to turn His back on His people, even when they turned from Him.

About a year ago, my oldest daughter and I had a battle of wills. The unstoppable force meets the immovable object.

She was trying to leave, I was trying to make her stay. I was behind her, with my arms around her middle. She was kicking, biting, scratching, and yelling. The harder she fought, the more I held on.

The more she screamed at me, the more I told her I loved her and I wasn’t going to let go. In that time of anger, frustration and physical pain, it would have been easier to just let her go, do what she wanted, and let the world handle her.

As I prepared to write for this week, I’ve been thinking of that morning with her. It occurred to me that, for the majority of my life, those same roles were being played out between my Heavenly Father and me.

Through my choices, beliefs and words, I kicked Him, bit Him, and screamed at Him to let me go.  He never did.   He held on and took whatever abuse I threw at Him because He loves me so much.

Only God could have held on to me for that long. Only He could continue to love me, call me His child, and fill even my darkest days with innumerable blessings.

Looking back, those moments with my daughter were a lesson not only to her, but to me.

The fierce love I felt for her, the willingness to hold on when the easier thing to do was let go, the desire to rebuild our relationship, all of those things we feel as parents are a gift from our Father, so that we might know just a fraction of the love He holds for us.

Lord, thank You for never letting go of me.

Jeanne Roberts