Digging Deeper

The mind controlled by the spirit is life and peace.          Romans 8:6

    I remember growing up, my adoptive mom used to say, “I just want some peace!”  When anyone would ask her what she wanted for Christmas or her birthday, she’d say “Just one day of peace!”

    Her life was not at all peaceful.  Up until she was no longer able to leave the house, she was always “running around”.  She had some wild friends and they were always out looking for a good time.  Once the good time was over, she wanted peace.  It never worked out that way though.  The “good times” were always followed with some type of consequence – either her own health paid the price for her good times or her relationships with friends, family, or acquaintances suffered.

    I was the same way when I was younger.  My mind was not controlled by the spirit.  My mind was controlled by my cravings for the “good times” this world provided.  Fortunately, I learned that ‘good times’ and ‘peace’ could not be achieved. 

   Chasing after the short-lived happiness that I found in the world could not result in peace for my soul.

    This is a lesson I’ve learned over and over.  When I cannot find peace for my soul, I examine what I’ve been up to that has led me to unease.  Every time, I discover that I have fallen and indulged temptation in one form or another.

    I find that if I’m not mindful of my actions, my thoughts or my words, I feel temptation pulling me in, like quicksand beneath my feet.

    Father, help me to not become lazy in You.  Keep me mindful of my actions so that I may not stumble into temptation.

    Read: Matthew 26:40-41

    By Jeanne Roberts

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. -Ephesians 6:10-12

 I have to say, this week has been difficult.  Writing about temptation has really put me through some tests.  It seems that every time I’ve sat down to write, something has happened to thwart me.  There was a time when I would have given up completely.  Now, though, I have the full armor of God, and I am standing against the devil’s schemes. 

 I was talking to a friend from work yesterday, and telling her about the trouble I’ve been having with getting these devotionals out.  This led us to a discussion about God, Salvation, Jesus.  She was interested and I was happy that she felt comfortable enough with me to ask questions.  It was a great conversation.  Minutes after we finished talking, I was hit with a sore throat and a headache.  My head pounded so hard, it hurt to think.  My throat was so sore and parched, it hurt to speak, or even get a drink.  Maybe I’m just freaking myself out, but it seemed pretty clear to me that Satan wants me to SHUT UP!

 I’m not going to.  This is too important for me to give in to his tricks. 

 It made me think of something else that Satan tempts us with – the choice to do nothing, to say nothing, to bow out of this whole thing.  In many cases, I think inaction is just as harmful as the temptation to do something we shouldn’t.

 As we go in our journey with Christ, if there is something you feel you should be doing, someone you feel you should be talking to, don’t let the devil block your path.  Don’t let him stop you.

 Father, thank You for the gifts You have given me, and for the strength You have lent to me.  Help me continue to work for Your glory.

 Read Mark 4:1-20

By Jeanne Roberts

Everything in the world – the cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes, and the boasting of what he has and does – comes not from the Father, but from the world.
-1 John 2:16

Satan’s plan to tempt us into a life of sin is an intricate one.  He knows that we are all created in God’s image. Man – the warrior, the protector, the hero.  Women also are created in God’s image.  That which is within women that longs to nurture, to be loved, desired, and pursued is also within God:

“You will seek me and find me when you see me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:13

“O Jerusalem, Jerusalem… how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing.” Matthew 23:37

Satan works on these characteristics that God has given us.  He 1) seeks to exploit them: “you’ll be seen as more masculine if you…” “you will be loved if you…” and he 2) seeks to suppress them: “you are not man enough…” “you are not worthy of love…”

Once he finds his way in, he continues to torture us through exploitation or suppression, and so often, we don’t even know he’s there until he’s got us tightly snared in a tapestry of sin and shame.

From there, it gets worse.  How often have we thought, “I’ve been TOO bad…” or “God could never forgive me…”?  I know I’ve said it hundreds of times, especially as a new Christian.  There were times I would sit, frozen in my car, afraid to leave the driveway as Satan told me that I was a fool for thinking God would want someone like me in His house.  Satan would recount every time I’d fallen for his temptations, building a case against me, telling me I may as well go back in the house, forget this God stuff, because I’m no good.

But, as always, in my weakness, God is strong.  As Satan tried to suppress my need for a real and personal relationship with Jesus, He was there, encouraging me, reminding me of the few Bible stories I still remembered, reminding me that He was desiring a relationship with me too.

Lord, thank You for being my strength when I am weakened.  Help me to remember that it is through You that I can defeat the plans of Satan.

Read: Lamentations 3:21-40

By Jeanne Roberts

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. -1 Corinthians 10:13

None of us has been tempted by something new.  I’d never thought of it in that way.

To me, it makes it seem a little easier to resist – thinking that millions have been in my situation and have had the strength to walk away.

It makes me feel like I’m not alone.

Satan knows that we are at our weakest when we are alone.  He tempted Jesus when He was alone.  Not when He was with His disciples, not when He was teaching the throngs of people who came to listen to Him.

We are vulnerable when we are alone.

Ladies, how many of us can walk through a parking lot with our friends or family at night and not feel the least bit apprehensive, but if we’re alone and walking to our car at night, suddenly we recall every urban myth email we’ve ever received?

I know I do!  I carry my car keys so that the keys are poking out between my fingers, making me a shorter, pudgier version of that guy from The X-Men.  I walk past my car a few steps so I can check to make sure there is no marauder lurking underneath, waiting to attack.

Sitting here at my computer, I realize how silly that sounds.  But in a dark parking lot alone, it makes perfect sense.  I know when I am alone I am vulnerable.

1 Corinthians 10:13 also tells us that God will provide a way out of temptation so that we may stand up under it.

So not only do we have the knowledge that scores of people have met and overcome whatever temptation we face, we also have God providing a way to flee from it.  Another reminder that we are not alone.  Jesus was not truly alone when he was being tempted by the evil one.  Physically, yes – but he was filled with the Holy Spirit.

Father, forgive me in my weakness.  Help me see the emergency exits You have provided when I need to flee from temptation.

Read: Psalm 1

By Jeanne Roberts

Blessed are all who fear the LORD, who walk in His ways.  Psalm 128:1

      Also in the article from Virtual Christian Magazine, Robert Berendt writes Ecclesiastes 9:9, God tells us to live joyfully with the wife whom you love. This is a two-way street, and we can just as easily understand this to be to live joyfully with the husband whom you love. Marriage allows us to express the deepest kind of love to one another, a love based on trust. Without trust, a marriage cannot survive, at least not a marriage that is godly and happy.

     Psalm 128 speaks of children like olive plants around the table of their parents. Parents having meals together and living like a family are vitally important role models for their children. That is what God wants for us, although we do not always reach that ideal. Both partners in a marriage have the responsibility of doing their part.

     When two people fear God, they will try harder to live as He directs. God intends for a marriage to last a lifetime, therefore before marriage, people need to be sure they have many things in common. Religious beliefs rank very high on that list. In fact, spiritual compatibility is the one factor that God commands in the Bible. A believer (one who is “in the Lord”) must not choose to marry a nonbeliever (1 Corinthians 7:39). We need to give time to counseling and planning as we try to ensure that our marriages are as happy as possible.

     Will you begin today to pray for your marriage?  Ask God to deepen your commitment and love to Him and to your spouse.  Seek each day to find something you appreciate about your spouse and tell him (her).  Hold hands frequently, speak in a tone of voice that denotes respect, and go out of your way to do something nice for each other.  Be diligent about guarding and fireproofing your marriage daily…live joyfully together.

Bible Reading:  Psalm 128

Teach us how to pray together has husband and wife.  Be in the center of our relationship to each other, Oh God the Creator of everlasting love. 

by  Dianna L. Brisco

“All of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous; not returning evil for evil…”       1 Peter 3:8

     Much to our parents’ dismay, Todd and I met our freshman year of college and got married the summer after our sophomore year.  Their fear of us not finishing our studies was a valid argument.  It was very difficult to balance classes, taking care of an apartment, cooking, cleaning, laundry, and learning to live with each other.   

     Once the honeymoon was over, the real challenge began. Marriage is work, requiring that two people merge their different personalities into a union that works well for everyone. If you succeed, you stay married and hopefully gain happiness. If you fail, it may result in a divorce, which can be painful for everyone in your family.

     Forming a happy marriage takes more than love. As I stated previously, it requires hard work. Both you and your spouse have to be willing to work and willing to learn how best to work together as a team. Sometimes this does not develop naturally. If you are finding that this is the case with you, you can make use of a marriage counselor to help develop those skills. Not all marriage counseling means that you are having serious problems with your relationship. Counseling and events like marriage encounter weekends are about improving your relationship, not necessarily repairing damage only.  Todd and I have visited a Christian counselor to help us improve our relationship and overcome difficulties.  It was a relief to talk to someone who was not emotionally involved with the situation.  He found out what our personality types are and how that determines how we each think, interpret situations, and solve problems.  No wonder our relationship had major snags!  We really are two very different people.  We were taught how to communicate more effectively and how to view things from each other’s unique perspective.  Meeting with the counselor was a blessing.  God helped us know and appreciate each other better with each session.  If you need advice or help, don’t be afraid to ask…our marriages are worth it.    

Bible Reading:  1 Peter 3:8-11

Our marriages are under attack, Father.  Help us learn to love and cherish each other.

by  Dianna L. Brisco

So guard yourself in spirit and do not break faith with the wife of your youth.  Malachi 2:15

      In an article from Virtual Christian Magazine, Robert Berendt states marriage is a wonderful but serious thing. Malachi 2:11-15 expresses God’s anger at men who “deal treacherously” with their wives, meaning men who do not remain faithful to the marriage vows. He also refers to marriage as a holy institution and a “covenant.” Husbands and wives should never let down in their efforts to build and maintain a lasting and loving marriage.

      God’s people are different from the rest of the world in that they strive to obey God and to live according to His Word. We want to be like Him, and in marriage we are able to learn and to express many of His attributes. Love, sharing, giving, forgiving, wisdom, kindness, trustworthiness, patience, nobleness and goodness are a few that come to mind. The marriage will reflect the degree to which a husband and wife are succeeding in this. Our marriages reflect our godliness. None of us is perfect, and we are all walking this path together. Understanding our frailties and need for a close mate will go a long way towards making our lives as happy as they can be within the conditions we find ourselves.

      Marriage is wonderful. God intended it for men and for women. This society has so twisted and distorted that godly intent and concept that we can find ourselves at war with the society we live in. God’s way is worth dying for and it is worth living for.  Marriage is from God. Use it wisely.

 Bible Reading: Malachi 2:11-15

     The marriage commitment is a sacred promise not only to our beloved, but to You Father. Make us realize the importance of our vows.

by  Dianna L. Brisco

Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.  Genesis 2:24

     August 15, 1982 was the day my dad walked me down our church’s aisle with tears in his eyes.  He was trusting another man with his only daughter.  As my dad stepped away from me and Todd took my hand, I trembled with excitement and fear.  This was my wedding day!  I had lost count of the many times I had played dress up in one of mom’s frilly dresses and too big high heel shoes.  I stumbled around trying to look like a radiant new bride and pretended to kiss my handsome husband.  Actually he was the post holding up our front porch, but with my eyes shut, the post became my true love.  But now my dad was giving me away for real.  God was giving me a helpmate to have and to hold from this day forward.

     Our marriage hasn’t always been easy.  Dirty diapers, vomit, and misunderstandings go hand in hand with feelings of love, warmth, and tenderness.  But through it all God has been there.  I can not express enough the importance of praying for God to bless your marriage.  Pray also for the Spirit of God to strengthen you and your spouse.  Focus first on your relationship with God and then your relationship with your spouse. Satan knows that a healthy Christian marriage and home is the best place to raise the next generation of Christian children.  So let’s pray for strength, love, and fullness in our marriages and in our families!       

 Bible Reading:  Joshua 24:15

     Heavenly Father, I pray for our marriages.  In Your Holy Name I pray a special blessing for each husband and wife.  Keep us strong and devoted to each other.  Teach us how to love with Your unconditional, unselfish love until death do us part.

 by  Dianna L. Brisco

 So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.  Ephesians 5:33

      I have to admit it.  Sometimes I get perturbed and down right angry with my husband.  Temporarily, I’d like to fight dirty and really put him in his place.  But the long term damage to our marriage isn’t worth the fleeting victory.  According to author, pastor, and marriage counselor Dr. David Kenworthy, there are six rules for a good, clean fight. 

 #1   Remember, you are on the same team.

The next time you are in a conflict with your spouse, stop and consider, Is what I’m about to say going to build up my spouse…or tear him down?

#2   Check your weapons to make sure they are not deadly.

Paul says we need to speak the truth to one another, but we’re also supposed to speak the truth “in love” (Ephesians 4:15) Don’t speak falsely, hurtfully, or out of spite. 

#3   Agree together that the time is right.

 Sometimes you are just too hurt or angry to talk without sinning.  It is wise to have some time to reflect on the issues.  Pray for God to intervene and help solve the conflict, and then attack the problem without attacking your spouse.

#4   Remember that the aim of the fight should be edification. 

 “Speak only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”  Ephesians 4:29

#5   Work out your conflict with your spouse, not your friends. 

 Whether the conflict or offense is as serious as an affair, or something less dramatic-such as consistently running late to family functions, overspending, poor judgment, forgetfulness, or finances-work out your conflict with your spouse, not the neighborhood.

#6   Heed the Spirit of God when He nudges to seek forgiveness and oneness. 

 “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”  (Ephesians 4:32)

 Bible Reading:  Ephesians 4:25-32

 Dear Heavenly Father, the Bible says we grieve Your Holy Spirit when we do not forgive one another.  Make me aware of the many times I need to say I’m sorry and make me courageous enough to say it.

by Dianna L. Brisco

“I am the Lord, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?  Jeremiah 32:27

    Both my parents and husband’s parents celebrated fifty years of marriage last year. Talk about a legacy of love.  Has it always been easy?  Absolutely not, but our parents’ wedding vows are sacred to them.  They promised each other to stick together through thick and thin, and they have kept that promise.  Many years of getting to know each other have helped them know when to talk, and when to be pleasantly quiet.  My mom has a plaque hanging by her sink that simply states, “Lord, help me this day to keep my big mouth shut.”  I recognize words of wisdom when I hear them!

    In our twenty six years of marriage, I have learned it is not important to win every argument.  It is more important to be respectful.  Hastily uttered heated words can come back to haunt me for years, so I bite my lip and pray for self control.  I also believe letting Todd know I enjoy being with him, gets many points in the staying together department.  Two of the best resources I’ve found for couples regarding romance in marriage are the books Rekindling the Romance by Dennis and Barbara Rainy, and Simply Romantic Nights-a collection of mystery dates for couples to take turns initiating.  Pick up a copy and then pray that the Lord uses these tools to help you reignite your romance God’s way.

Bible Reading:  Hebrews 13:4

Help me this day to be creative and fun in the way I love my husband…he is Your gift to me.

by Dianna L. Brisco